Sunday, September 23, 2007

How Soccer Commentary Should Be Done

by Ken Houghton

My Loyal Reader sends this link to Manchester United v Chelsea. Sample comments:
[Chelsea manager] Avram immediately comes bounding down to the touchline from the dugout; maybe [Chelsea owner] Roman's thrown a stick onto the pitch.

"This has the potential to be the dullest Big Four clash in history, and that's saying something," shouts Archi Campbell over a torrent of running hot water, between mouthfuls of Tesco Value Gin. "It might even end up with a negative amount of goals." Archi, you're talking my language.

Chelsea just haven't a clue, although here I'm specifically talking about the team.

I'm trying to see both sides here, and have ended up saying nothing.

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